This week I was traveling for work-- attending a training for trainers hosted by the Department of Education. The training was held about four and a half hours from home, which meant that I would be away for four days! When my kids were younger I side-stepped these events. When asked, I would say that I couldn't be away over night. A few years ago I accepted a new job, one that requires more traveling and conference time away from home. This trip is my second overnighter since September. My children are older now and I feel a little bit more at ease when I need to leave home for another trip. But that didn't change the fact that when I was packing my suitcase on Tuesday morning, I was moving pretty slowly, not really "into it." I was starting to get really sad as I thought about all of the time I would be separated from my hubby and kiddos. I waited until the very last minute and then pulled out of the driveway and headed south toward Palm Beach. I will be honest--- I have a difficult time being alone sometimes--- having been in total mom and wife mode for almost 20 years, I am sometimes very uncomfortable all by myself. Tonight was no different. I made it to the hotel room getting tucked in and cozy for the night. After asking myself, "What am I going to do?" I indulged in watching one of my favorite television shows, The Voice.
The next morning I found a cute little breakfast restaurant and enjoyed the company of myself while I texted my hubby and daughter to check in on the morning happenings--- it's hard for this momma not being there!!! While sitting alone, I thought about my current situation. Seeing others eating alone in a restaurant usually makes me feel a little sad for that person, but today I saw this in a different light. I was not alone-- I was sharing this time with a very important person---ME!
After the training on Thursday, I decided to drive to Worth Avenue at the suggestion of a friend. This area of Palm Beach is amazing. It is the Beverly Hills of South Florida. The homes are big and beautiful and amazing to see. Worth Avenue is quite charming- little shops and big retailers with very recognizable names-- Tiffany, Jimmy Choo, Neiman Marcus, Cartier, Gucci, Vineyard Vines-- to name a few, and scattered throughout were art galleries and dealers.
I was lucky enough to find an empty parking spot right on the street. The weather was cool and the time of day cast a perfect combination of twilight shadow and sunlight sparkle on the street. I walked the sidewalks looking into windows, oohing and aahing at gorgeous, fiery diamonds and beautiful clothes. I visited an art gallery with amazing larger than life sculptures of everyday people. I wanted to snap a few pictures of these, but the gallery attendant followed me around the entire time. And, as I walked along alone, I smiled to myself. I was being adventurous and spending time in the quietness of my own little world. Before I entered this season of life (which I love dearly and would not exchange a moment of), I had been a very adventurous single young woman- I would travel and visit friends, do mission work in needy areas, and do things that I thought were interesting and fulfilling in a different way to the fulfillment I enjoy now as a wife and mother. It was nice to feel that way again. Just spending an hour walking the street of a new place, a place that at first glance seemed so different than home... but then again it wasn't that much different. I was the difference-- spending time, if only for a little while, in a love affair with myself.
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